This settles it—I’m getting a penguin.
Does anyone else think this list of America’s most stressful jobs is missing a few? I’m looking at you, overly-worked doctors and stressed-the-fuck-out lawyers. [CNBC]
I refuse to acknowledge Donald Trump as a presidential contender. I’ll gladly acknowledge, however, that The Donald has a totally weird-looking hair situation. [Vanity Fair]
The color-coded terror alert system is now a thing of the past. The five-category system is being replaced with an equally vague and chaffy two-category system. [Newser]
Going out tonight? Be sure to brush up on your funky chicken dance moves with James Brown.
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