People should stop making babies for two simple reasons: 1. More people means less stuff for the rest of us 2. Loose vagina.
Point 1. The Earth and everything we depend on to live is finite. More people means they need more things which means that there is less stuff for the rest of us. As long as you are smarter than a retarded 4th grader this should be obvious to you. What may not be so obvious is the implications of having less stuff. We are already seeing the effects of this. Food prices are now the highest they have ever been while gas prices are setting new records in America… and the latter is based on fear, just wait till it’s based on shortages (I’m so excited for next weekend’s fuel riot!). Everything from electronics to action figures and furniture get more expensive to make when less resources are available. But hey, who hasn’t wanted to pay 50 bucks for a Barbie? The second problem this creates is environmental. Using all this shit means that there will be more toxic stuff in our air, soil, rivers and oceans and less healthy habitats. For all you PETA people this means less places for cute little animals like Harp Seals to frolic while being chased by hunters with clubs. While I’m all for becoming a tyrant ruler of mutants that will soon inhabit the Pacific Gyre I do prefer my fish without the mandatory side of mercury. So what does this mean in real terms? Well, using more resources increases poverty, crime, disease and starvation as well as creates the ideal situation for war and revolution (Tunisia started over food riots). Gated communities with NATO no-fly zones anyone? Sign me up!
Point 2. Loose vaginas (the ones caused by child birth, not the ones caused by missing your sex addicts anonymous meeting) are no fun for anyone! NOBODY LIKES THIS unless they have a fantasy of throwing a hot dog down a hallway. Save the Kegel muscles!
Oh, you want to have sex? It’s called birth control, condoms or a vasectomy. Oh you want a kid? First of all, I think there must be something wrong with you. While the process of making babies is fun… actually having a baby is hell. After the thing explodes out a the woman causing point 2 of my argument it doesn’t stop complaining or speak English and you can’t reason with it! But if you still want a kid, then adopt one. There are plenty of kids out there who you should give a better life to before adding one more kid to the world just because you wanted your own one. Oh, you want a bunch of kids? Good thing there are nearly 145 million orphans in the world for you to choose from. Pull a Brangelina and create the model UN in your living room for all I care. It’s kinda like baseball cards at this point for these people and it can be for you too if you want to roll with a grip of children. But, for the love of God, do not have a bunch of your own kids. There will inevitably be ugly and dumb ones and the last the thing the world needs is more dumb ugly people. Let’s take care of the ones we have before making more. Yes, societies are aging and the elderly must be taken care of but that’s what robots are for. What about all the problems the world is facing now? Good thing we have produced a metric fuck-ton of people in the last 30 years; I’m sure some of them will figure out how to fix all those problems and, hopefully, not create any more.
The Bottom Line:
We are nearing a Malthusian catastrophe of epic proportions and there is only one way to avoid it. We need to be more efficient with how we procreate. Lets raise the kids we have before making more. We can’t depend on techno fixes like we did with the green revolution for food in the 70’s and 80’s. Do the right thing. Make the world, and vaginas, a better place for all mankind. The solution is simple – Don’t reproduce.